特别的一天

虽然我和你没了, 如果我们有今天的一天就是我们的半年周年了. 而且我没忘过这一天,29号, 应为对我来说是有很多好和不好的记忆. 算了吧...

哭过就好了

不喜欢怀疑什么 并不表示我没有感受

bu xi huan huai yi shen me, bing bu biao shi wo mei you gan shou

看你微妙的变化 慢慢不同

kan ni wei miao de bian hua, man man bu tong

我不是生气 只是心痛

wo bu shi sheng qi, zhi shi xin tong

最讨厌被误会了 但越解释越觉得难过

zui tao yan bei wu hui le, dan yue jie shi yue jue de nan guo

你可以说人会变 但不能说 你会这么做是我的错

ni ke yi shuo ren hui bian, dan bu neng shuo, ni hui zhe me zuo shi wo de cuo

哭过就好了 伤都会好的

ku guo jiu hao le, shang dou hui hao de

这样相信所以深呼吸着割舍

zhe yang xiang xin suo yi shen hu xi zhe ge she

爱是为了拥抱 为了牵手

ai shi wei le yong bao, wei le qian shou

不是为了争吵 为了调头

bu shi wei le zheng chao, wei le diao tou

哭过就好了 痛都会走的

ku guo jiu hao le, tong dou hui zou de

记忆有限 所以它会淘汰坏的

ji yi you xian, suo yi ta hui tao tai huai de

失眠听歌 想念虽然苦涩

shi mian ting ge, xiang nian sui ran ku se

还是谢谢你让我长大了

hai shi xie xie ni rang wo zhang da le

越多美好堆叠的过往

yue duo mei hao dui ji de guo wang

想忘就得推倒更大的悲伤

xiang wang jiu de tui dao geng da de bei shang

要找勇气却不在口袋或手上

yao zhao yong qi que bu zai kou dai huo shou shang

但它一定在我身上某个地方

dan ta yi ding zai wo shen shang mou ge di fang

Doesn't like to suspicious but it doesn't mean that I've no feelings

Watching you changing slowly to a different person

I'm not angry but disappointed

Most hated to be misunderstood but the more explanations, the more disappointment

You can say that humans will change but you can't say that whatever you did this is my fault

Pain relieves after crying

I believe this than giving out deep breath

Love is all about huggings and holding hands

Not arguements and regrets

Pain relieves after crying

Memories are limited that's why bad memories overtakes

Although listening to songs during insomnia is torturing

Just to thank you for making me grow up

The more beautiful memories stacked

Would have more sadness to overcome when erasing memories

Do find the courage but not from your hands in your pocket

Thus, it's all around me

如果我能哭完之后心情会好一点哪有多么好呢...

可是为了你而泪值得吗?

这首歌是满室和我现在的心情

也希望你下次会有跟好的一天

应为我知道我们不会在一起了

如果我们真的在一起来过, 结果也是不便的...

就让我最后一次跟你道歉在我所做错的事情

对不起, 再见!

Stopped.

After 11 days of your birthday, I broke up. Though I've seen and knew some of your family member, I still prefer to be "away" from you. Many sad memories are still kept in my mind till one day which is now that I can't stand anymore and that's why I insist to. You've asked me "Are you sure that there's no memories that can keep us together again?" for a few times and yes there's but I don't wanna follow what I've did previously and made myself regret very much. Yes, you've also complained that I'm demanding and I agreed but I just want you to know what's the reason behind what I'm doing. It's not that I don't wanna give you freedom but you've just misused your freedom that you have when you're fifteen.

Now as I'm typing this, it's my first day of being single again. I hope that our final break up is a lesson for you. Being as single is a much better that you don't have to listen to a partner of yours, don't have to pay double for what you're actually paying for, and you can have more fun. Trust me. As for feelings, you said you loved me more than I love you. Then, who's the one giving more true love and care? Living in a normal life as what people do like study, active and outings in the morning and sleeps at night.

So, everything seems to turn into dusts now. You have your way and I'll have mine. Good luck and all the best. Thank you for respecting my decision.

Happy Birthday Dear!

HAPPY 19th BIRTHDAY, ERIC TAN! :D

Happy Happy Birthday to you~

We gathered at Woon's house at 9.00pm but Phoebe was late so we started to move at 9.30pm. Reach Lot10 and went into Shabu One, 3rd floor after the birthday boy paid for all of us, thank you dear! :) Everyone eat, eat, eat, and eat non-stop till everyone's bloated :S Around 11.45pm there comes the birthday boy's chocolate blueberry cake! Celebrated his birthday within 15 minutes before it's over. Well, not all had the cake unfortunately cuz' all was kinda bloated. Then, had a mini drinking session where the birthday boy had to drink Chivas that he brought to the dinner for 5 seconds from the mouth of the bottle. Success! Then, there's another between Woon and C.Yong where Woon starts to drink and then C.Yong. Sadly there's no second sessions and everyone went back home after that. The end, simple and easy. (:

Me & Eric dear ;)

Eric with the guys.

Kai whatcha doin' ?

Eric with the girls.

Praying for the cake to BOOM!

Slice!

Birthday Eve

It's your birthday eve! And a dumbo girlfriend of yours just bought things last minute. Nothing much but hope you will like it :)

Disappointedly depressed

I'm very very very disappointed at myself that I think I expected too much. As you introduce me, I know you were very shy but still others helped you to say the word that you were too shy about to speak it out. Why would you say "yeah something like that.." and "can say so la.." since others helped you spoke it out already? The dinner was fine and I'm okay with them. They even treated me better than you do. During the entry and intros, I've already got such impressions. Then, while we're waiting for the next dish, you told me you've signed up for the gym that she went. I remembered that previously you said that she'd stopped going to gym and when we met her together with you, she just said that she just finished her gym there. Fine. After dinner, you fetched me home and didn't even ask me where would I like to go or maybe a movie for two of us only? Instead I was the one should be telling you what a boyfriend should do but you ignored and ask me whether I would find her for a tea since we're near her place. Never once you'd ask me for a movie unless I did. Reached home you said I was angry when I was holding up my tears and very upset and depressed. Obviously, I pretended in front of you that I wasn't. On the phone you said you heard I was crying. There I expected again that you'd say you're coming to look for me now as you said last time you would sacrifice for me. Done. What I heard was, I'll come and find you tomorrow 12pm okay? There's still tomorrow to come.

Somehow I just felt am I really that bad or just friends? The whole dinner is just like introducing to your family as a friend. Everyday I kept asking myself a question that till now I couldn't even get a perfect answer from anyone and even myself. As I'm typing this post, seriously I'm crying like shit right now. It's the worst thing ever in my life. You asked me to treat you better like before, now I did and what I get wasn't the one I want. Even to treat you better, I tried to protect my feelings for you before it 100% fades away eversince October. You've never once taken my heart away before and you've failed many times and the word "sorry" I've heard for tons. Everytime we almost broke up officially, you said a lot of good things that you make me not to break up with you just because you can't leave me. End up your promises never ever come true. Not even one. You said that you'd listen to me and promise me and whatever shits that you'd say just to make me refuse are all bullshits. Now, you made me feel regret that I let go of him, patched up with you, and those break ups before. You kept saying you're a beginner. Don't you observe everywhere around you how bgfs are treated? Why do you even care what people see and thinks about what your action is that is what I strongly don't understand about it.

Now there's another scar. How many scars have you made? How long should I stand? What am I in your eyes? Am I actually doing the one-sided love you said before? How much love left from me for you? Can you ever ever know and see deeply what my feelings were? What my tears were? I just can't believe that you still can hang out with your friends with giggles after I've heard your accidentally recorded voicemails. Seriously, I can get over it and I WON'T LET GUYS RUIN MY LIFE! It's my fucking life damn it!

How you expected, I granted most. What I expected never comes. All this were strangling me. Nothing else in my mind but break ups.

It's my last day of holiday now as I'm feeling free to blog, incase there's no time for me to do it. I hope I will have better time management than last term as many things have to rush. Sleeping early tonight as tomorrow have to wake up early to go for a full day class ): It's been quite sometime that I didn't really wake up in the mornings. Sadly, this term is kinda boring as I assumed. Only studio lessons are interesting which this term I'm gonna take is Studio 4 : Restaurant. Others were, furniture history, malay and moral. Ughh. ARCS, I have no idea what subject is this but give it a try. Signing off, ciaoz.

Happy 2010!

Happy Twenty-Ten to all my family members, dearests, besties, friends, and readers! Eventhough 2009 was a great year to most of us but let's make 2010 a better year for a better living! Cheers.

New Year Eve

Introduced Eric to my family and seems like there's no comment or any question asked. Maybe because there's too many food so they forgot to ask? Just weird. Anyways, went to Tony's restaurant after dinner, saw Alison Chow and her family there, and took picture while watching fireworks :D

Us, us and us. Oops, I mean Zhong and his cutie sista, Wei Ping :)

Went to mamak afterthat at ABC, Kuchai Lama to meet up Yen and Yit Han :)

I was wearing contact lens by the way.. that's why my eyes look a lot smaller than usual ):